Florida road tripping, the Keys to my heart.

Leaving Miami towards the Florida Keys

I have always had an inexplicable infatuation with America, especially the Southern States. Perhaps this can be blamed on a diet of American TV shows growing up and first teenage crushes on those ruggedly handsome cowboys riding through Westerns, who epitomized my idea of masculinity. To this day, the sound of any Southern accent makes me weak at the knees. Southern Florida, where it seems all the men boat, fish, hunt, camp, drive beefy pick up trucks and look like they could build or weld something for you at the drop of the hat, was my happy place for over a week.

Getting around

My rental, as soon as I sat in I realised I want an even bigger one!

I rented a pickup at Fort Lauderdale Hollywood International Airport from Enterprise Rental for $44 per day in preparation for a road trip. I like to drive something which feels like it could crush or eat most of the other vehicles, so a pickup is my spirit vehicle. Renting a car in the U.S. is incredibly easy, I have done so on my Irish, UAE and South Korean drivers license in the past. Driving in Florida is also horribly easy, I used Google Maps navigation when I had data and Maps.Me ( https://maps.me/ )for offline use so there is no need to pay extra for a navigation system with the vehicle.

fort lauderdale

My primary reason for going to Fort Lauderdale was to attend The Matthew Hussey Retreat ( http://www.matthewhussey.com/ ). I started following Matthew Hussey around 4 years ago after a breakup, when in the bleak aftermath of post mortem analysis you start searching for answers to the endless internal monologue. Matt offers practical advice and strategies devoid of that annoying fluff much self-help can favor and without the ardent evangelical vibe of some other renowned life coaches. The venue The Marriott Beach and Harbor Resort, a truly beautiful location, which certainly provided detachment from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Whilst best known for his dating and relationship advice, the retreat offered so much more and was truly a transformational and empowering experience for me. I would recommend any woman who has the means to do this as I have learned lessons I wish I had understood decades ago and the whole week was a succession of “Aha” moments. On top of that I have met an incredible and supportive group of women whom I am still in touch with and will be friends for life, I am sure. Follow Matt on Instagram, YouTube or Facebook to get an idea of what he is about yourself or contact me directly if you want to know more about my personal experience.

miami beach

Miami, my friends, is expensive. I paid a small fortune in both street and covered parking facilities during my 2 night stay near Miami Beach at the Getty Suites ( https://thegettysuites.com/ ). The studio was fully stocked with appliances and perfect for self-catering accommodation. It was also the cheapest private room I found in the area at $69 per night before tax. There are no shortage of eating and drinking options in Miami, a definite party vibe, everywhere appears to be “clothing optional” and getting around by electric scooter is trending.

Everglades and Alligators

Everglades Safari – view from the airboat

A trip to the Everglades is, in my opinion, a must for anyone who is a nature and greenery enthusiast. There is no need to pre-book an Everglades tour unless, of course, you do not have your own personal transportation, in which case there are no shortage of tour operators based in Miami. We stopped at Everglades Safari Park ( http://www.evergladessafaripark.com/ ) which boasted the same offerings as the other operators we passed; Airboat tour, alligator show and nature walk. The ticket cost $28 for adults and $15 for kids aged 5-11.


The largest sized airboats, private tours in smaller boats are also available.
You can practically see my skin burning here.
Spot the gator – a real life magic eye picture!
Look mom! A baby gator!!

I opted for the large airboat tour, the guides are knowledgeable and happy to answer any and all ridiculous questions. We did, in fact, spot a gator after we disembarked which was just hanging out next to the jetty. I can only assume it was waiting for a stray child to snack on. The gator show also did not disappoint. We were treated to delightful moments where you are teased with the possible gory spectacle of a trainer having his hand chomped off as it passes through a prehistoric and sinister looking toothy jaw. Everyone left the show with limbs intact and some great Insta worthy shots to prove we had all actually been there.

the florida keys: accommodation

The drive down to the Keys is stunning, you will want to stop everywhere. If you are a craft beer drinker, there are a number of breweries which you might want to check out along the way in Islamadora ( https://www.islamoradabeerco.com/ ). I was keen to make my way down to Key West which is the southernmost town so made an overnight stop in Key Largo where I paid the most I’ve ever paid to date for a Holiday Inn at $190 (inclusive of tax) for a night. In Key West accommodation is also pricey, I found this gem, Casablanca, in Old Towne on Duval Street for $150 per night ( https://www.keywestcasablanca.com/ ) The room was spacious, towels and robes were fluffy and breakfast to the tune of $10 was included.

Food and drink in key west

Kitsch, quirky and artsy vibes in Key West
Harpoon Harry’s for delicious diner food
Lobster Benedict with home fries and Key Lime Pie. Foodgasm!

One of my favourite things about road trips in the U.S. are the diners, Harpoon Harry’s ( http://www.harpoonharryskeywest.com/ ) is a must if you like diner food and friendly staff. I had my first slice of Key Lime Pie here and yes, it is as amazing as everyone says it is! You can also get Key lime cocktails, frappes, french toast and any other Key Lime food or drink variations you could possibly think of in this town.

Indulge in beer heaven at Waterfront Brewery ( https://www.thewaterfrontbrewery.com/ ) where IPA and beer lovers can feel righteous as they drink and learn at the same time. Sloppy Joes ( https://sloppyjoes.com/ ) is another firm local favourite which used to be a haunt of the literary hellraiser Ernest Hemmingway and now serves up a bustling atmosphere of food, drinks and live music. Two Friends is another friendly bar where you can partake of the aforementioned Key West frozen cocktails, or deliciousness in a glass as I like to call it. If you want to go fancy then check out the artisan cocktails and mixology in General Horseplay ( https://www.generalhorseplay.com/ ) where you can roll the dice to get among other things a $1 cocktail! General Horseplay put the class into day drinking with their aesthetically pleasing beverages and drinking receptacles which make you squeal in delight (yes, giant gold gnome, I’m talking about you!). This girl walked away somewhat relieved that her $1 cocktail now offset the horrific $20 for an hour of parking she was charged at the nearby private lot.

Pictured above in Old Town Tavern , Dean’s meat candy. “You have not lived until you’ve tried this” quote from unfaithful vegetarian. Out of shot Mac n Cheese Balls, also frighteningly tasty.

Last but not least, you must pay Jessica and Justin a visit at the Old Town Tavern ( https://oldtowntavernkw.com/ ), this was my “Cheers” and I met so many great people here both in front of and behind the bar. My neighbour and friend in the UAE, suggested I say “Hi” to Jess, her Crossfit buddy from years back in the U.K. a now Key West resident and the rest is history. I developed a huge lady crush on Jessica, who was generous enough to entertain, host and show me around Key West. In true Pride fashion we got trashy matching henna tattoos of each other’s names as a souvenir. if you drop in you might be fortunate to meet Dean, sitting at the end of the bar after his shift. Chef Dean is a wizard in the kitchen who uses his powers for the greater good and is solely responsible for me cheating on vegetables. Dean waxed lyrical with seductive promised of meat candy, or burnt ends to those of you familiar with barbecue lingo. I was sold at “Meat Candy” and I regret nothing! Old Town Tavern also turned out to be the setting for one of my three green card marriage proposals during my Florida trip so I think it’s safe to say you can find a good time here, if you’re looking for one.

Hemmingway and 6-toed cats

Lipin, my travel buddy elegantly modelling Hemmingway’s writing room where the magic happened.

The Hemmingway House ( https://www.hemingwayhome.com/ ) in Key West offers guided tours for $14 for adults and $11.50 for kids 6-12 years old. The guide recounts charming anecdotes about the literary genius including how he came to have 9 concussions in his lifetime and the cute meet stories of his four wives (Spoiler Alert: 3 of his wives were formerly bffs of the previous wife). It seems Hemmingway fell into the old “cute kitten multiplies into 100 cats a year later” trap which happens to the best of us. The cats now roaming the premises have a carefully cultivated genetic quirk which bestows an extra toe upon them This mutation has earned them “welfare cat” status with a permanent place at the home along with their very own free healthcare system and dedicated cemetery in the grounds. Include this visit on your itinerary if only for the genius underfloor air conditioning vents over which you can skillfully place a pant leg, whilst listening to the guide, and indulge in your very own much needed private air conditioning. It’s worth noting, at this point, that the Florida sun in Key West was relentless in it’s pursuit of a permanent high noon position. In the words of Baz Luhrmann, wear Sunscreen.

Kitty cat cemetery – is this 6-toed cat ready to croak?
I peered at this cat for at least a minute trying to get a good look at his 6 digits.

leaving home

Pride preparations
A unicorn, because why not?
Homage to Jess xxx

I fell head over heels in love with Key West. There is a strong community vibe here which reminded me so much of Ireland, you are surrounded by the ocean and sunshine and I met the most amazing people. There is clearly a holiday buzz as it is a popular holiday destination among both local and international visitors and visiting on Pride week amplified that feeling with Pride murals, rainbow crosswalks and cute boys in rainbow colored booty shorts strutting down the sidewalk together. This transient holiday feeling is underpinned, though, with something more substantial and you get the feeling residents here truly care about each other and their home. For the first time in my 43 countries of travel, I felt homesick leaving a place and have vowed I will find my way back soon.

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